My year of self-care

And my top books to read to learn how to take things slow

I’m learning how to slow down and look after myself

This year hasn’t been going exactly how I planned.

Last year I shared my experience of having emergency surgery for a ruptured ectopic pregnancy. Well, back in January I unfortunately had another miscarriage.

I know many people choose not to talk about pregnancy loss and I completely understand the reasons for wanting to keep such a painful experience private. But as a writer, I have always found that writing my way through things helps me process, and part of that process is sharing my words with others.

There’s something very isolating about pregnancy loss, as you’ll know if it’s something you’ve experienced. It can feel difficult to explain the sense of grief when it isn’t entirely tangible. Or how hard it can be when dates roll around that are so significant to you but mean little to anyone else, like the fact it will soon be the date of what would have been my due date in my first lost pregnancy.

While I hoped that this year would be a very different kind of year, one thing that has come out of such a rough start to 2025 is a readjustment of my priorities.

I’ve decided that 2025 is going to be my year of self-care. I’ve been thinking about self-care for a long time - it was a big theme in my novel The Lifeline - but I haven’t always been great at practising it in my own life.

I’m very lucky that my next book (out in January 2026) is done and dusted and I have a nice long deadline for my next one, longer than I have had in many years.

It means I’m fortunate enough to have something I haven’t had for quite a while: time. And instead of filling that time with things that feel ‘productive’ or ‘useful’, I’m trying to fill it with not much at all. With things that fill my cup.

So far this year in the name of self-care I have:

• Joined a pool, gym and co-working space that feels like taking a little holiday every time I visit

• Got a massage (maybe the third I’ve had in my life)

• Started daily journalling

• Had a go at meditating

• Done a lot of yoga

• Gone on some long walks

• Taken lots of long baths

• Taken lots of naps

I’m so used to putting massive emphasis on my productivity, so it’s been a shift for me to move my focus elsewhere.

A hack I’ve found helpful is writing a list at the end of each day of everything I’ve done for my self-care. Writing it down makes it feel like an accomplishment worth celebrating, in the same way that I write down how many words of my novel I’ve written each day to keep me motivated and to help me celebrate the wins along the way.

I’m hoping that some of the things I’m trying out will become self-care habits that become part of my life, even when deadlines creep up again and I’m in a busier phase of the publishing process.

Writing and publishing books happens in cycles. I’m in a phase now where my hard work is done for a bit and it’s over to my amazing publishing team to work on the cover design and marketing campaign. I should see a concept for the cover soon and can’t wait! It’s a surreal but lovely moment when the story that you came up with starts to look like a real thing.

I can’t wait to share this next book with you when it comes out next year. Thinking about it feels like something to look forward to. And it feels very pertinent to be sharing a book that’s about healing from grief through books when I’m going through another bout of grief, and feeling ever grateful for the comfort and solace of books.

Life has its ups and downs. But I feel very lucky to have both writing and reading books there at my disposal, as a way of processing the world and all it throws our way.

If you’re after some comforting reads to soothe your soul, here are some of my recommendations…

• Books for self-care

• My favourite comfort reads

• Books for grief